Early Mornings

I have discovered that I love waking up early in the morning.  The hardest part is getting out of bed, and honestly it can be a struggle to get up early and really only happens for about half of the week (I’m talking 5:15 AM early!).  When I actually do make it out of bed though I feel completely energized and ready to go once I actually start work at 8.  If I make it out of bed I do the following:

5:15 ---Hit up 24 Hour Fitness and struggle through an elliptical torture machine while listening to some music. 

6:00 ---Hate the gym and leave but love how I feel after working out…as though I could take on the world….enough so to wink at the desk guy on the way out even though I have no makeup on and my hair is all sweaty from working out…..ok the winking part is a lie…but the no makeup and messy hair is a very real and scary reality that I don't care enough to work on that early in the morning.

6:15 ---Have some time to catch up on reading, devotionals, listen to a podcast or journaling.  I’m more productive at this time in the morning, especially if I have made it to the gym and back already.

7:00 ---Get ready for work and actually have time to cook breakfast instead of grabbing something packaged to go.  Occasionally I indulge myself by swinging by the coffee stand on the way to work and picking up some coffee or green tea with an almond croissant…..those are my favorite days but I only do it a couple times a month or I wouldn’t cherish the croissants as much.  They are phenomenal.

It is super hard to get up this early in the morning, but literally by the time I get to work at 7:50 I have a spring in my step.  I find that when I roll out of bed at 7:00 I end up rushing to get to work, am grouchy, and am kind of sluggish all day long.  I don’t ACTUALLY make it out of bed at 5:15 every day but what a difference it makes when I do…..I at least try to get up by the 6:15 time.  I do have to intentionally go to bed early and lay out all my gym clothes or I will use it as an excuse in the morning to stay in bed. 

I have been trying to get up so early because I joined the gym and find that my evenings are so busy I can’t even make it to the gym….it’s actually been a good way to have some time to myself.  I’m thinking of getting a new phone so that I can listen to podcasts and have some iTunes at the gym….I think if I get any phone has been out for the last three years then it will be an upgrade!

Here is a song that has been stuck in my head the last few days and am listening to bright and early this morning!  It is Beautiful Things by Gungor.  They are good.  Listen to them sometime!

For all the Ladies out there

I was emailed the below note at work today. I normally don't pay attention to email chains but thought this one was cute.  As girls, self-confidence issues are never absent, skinny OR chunky!  Hopefully one of these days we can show the next generation of girls that being healthy is more important than looking like a supermodel, that being genuine is more important than popularity, and that loving and reaching out to others is far more valuable than wealth.  Here's to all my beautiful lady friends.  Continue to be your amazingly real selves!

"Recently, in a large city a poster featuring a young, thin and tan woman appeared in the window of a gym.  It said, "This summer, do you want to be a mermaid or a whale?"  A middle-aged woman, whose physical characteristics did not match those of the woman on the poster, responded publicly to the question posed by the gym.

To whom it may concern,
Whales are always surrounded by friends (dolphins, sea lions, curious humans.) They have an active sex life, get pregnant and have adorable baby whales.  They have a wonderful time with dolphins and stuffing themselves with shrimp.  They play and swim in the seas, seeing wonderful places like Patagonia, the Bearing Sea and the coral reefs of Polynesia.  Whales are wonderful singers and have even recorded CDs.  They are incredible creatures and virtually have no predators other than humans.  They are loved, protected and admired by almost everyone in the world.  

Mermaids don't exist.  If they did exist, they would be lining up outside the offices of Argentinean psychoanalysts due to identity crisis. Fish or human?? They don't have a sex life because they kill men who get close to them, not to mention how could they have sex?  Just look at them...where is IT?  Therefore, they don't have kids either.  Not to mention, who wants to get close to a girl who smells like a fish store?  

The choice is perfectly clear to me: I want to be a whale. We are in an age when media puts into our heads the idea that we have to be skinny people to be beautiful, but I prefer to enjoy an ice cream with my kids, a good dinner with a man who makes me shiver, and a piece of chocolate with my friends.  With time, we gain weight because we accumulate so much information and wisdom in our heads that there is no more room, it distributes out to the rest of our bodies.  So we aren't heavy, we are enormously cultured, educated and happy.  Beginning today, when I look at my butt in the mirror I will think, "Good grief, look how smart I am!"

Benny

I have always wanted to grow vegetables and never tried.  I am incredibly talented at not keeping plants alive.  The only one that has lasted so far is the bamboo plant I have at my office.  But I'm not sure if bamboo counts.  I bought an air plant at a Christmas bizarre that I went to with my mom.  When I say air plant...I mean it should be able to survive my sad plant caregiver skills. It does not need to be planted in dirt and literally just breathes air. See below:

 

Once a week you drench it with water.  This should be a piece of cake.  These small plants can either hang in the air, or you can just set them in a container with no dirt.  The root I was told was really only needed if you wanted to glue them to something!  I don't normally name plants but I named my air plant Benny since I figured this one should be able to last long enough for me to develop an emotional bond with it. 

Unfortunately Benny has not been doing so well.  I should take that back, he was doing well until I pruned him.  I was just trying to prune him and pull off a brown dead leaf and the poor guy's whole root came off.  So now Benny is soaking in water on my desk...I'm hoping it's like a starfish and the root will regrow?? Probably not but worth a shot. I haven't decided if I am just going to never ever name a plant again....or go with Benny II, Benny III, Benny IV, and so on.

Soup. Tomatoes. Olives. Artichokes. Brownies. Ice Cream. Strawberries. Nachos. And more Chips.

Today I had some friends over after church and made a huge pot of Zuppa Toscana Soup.  I made it a little extra spicy today.  So extra spicy that the soup pot poured out steam filled with the smell of the red crushed pepper and made everyone cough and not be able to breath from inhaling red pepper smoke.  Who needs a fire alarm?  Apparently medical masks are needed to survive my cooking.

My friend Alyssa came over to join the soup eating festivities.  I love pregnant ladies, or at least I do until they start eating all my food.  Alyssa, my current favorite pregnant friend, lives across the parking lot from me.  She came over and ate a bowl of soup.  When she was done with the soup she snacked on the cherry tomatoes from the salad..….then the olives.  She would have had more olives but we ran out and she told me not to worry about opening another can when I offered.  She then rummaged through the fridge and found some artichokes (I didn’t even know we had those).  And then found some salsa that she ate with some of our tortilla chips.  Meanwhile, I made some caramel turtle brownies for dessert.  While the brownies were cooking she asked if I had cleaned out the bowl yet.  I hadn’t so she immediately took care of scraping the brownie batter and eating that.  Once the brownies were out, we had brownies with ice cream and cut up strawberries.  She took hers in a to-go bowl and went home for an afternoon nap.

I went to an evening church service and when we got home I received a call from my favorite pregnant friend asking if any of us were hungry. I told her to come on over, we at least had some left over soup if anything.  She showed up and while I was looking around trying to find something to eat she informed me she was thinking of nachos.  So….we proceeded to make some nachos with cheese and salsa and sour cream.  So good.  After I cleaned up all the nacho makings and we were sitting around the table talking….she got the chips and salsa back out to munch on.  I can't wait to be pregnant someday......Sunday eating and napping days sound amazing.  Well, off to restock my fridge....love you Alyssa!

Ignoring Martha Stewart

I have been learning about hospitality this week.  I know this sounds elementary but it is something I have been thinking about.  I love helping to organize events or parties and spoiling others.  It is always stressful but I really enjoy seeing other people have a good time with each other.  What I never seem to remember to do is invite people over or open up my home.  It is normally last minute when people come over and quite frankly, most people have to invite themselves over (which I love!).  What I have been trying to smack into my head lately is that everything doesn’t have to be perfect to invite someone over.  Yes, I prefer the apartment to be clean and I would love to wow them with my best meal, but that is not really the most important reason to open up my home. 

A lot of times when I don’t initiate conversations or reach out to people it’s because I personally can feel self-conscious.  I guess in a way I figure “why would they even want to come over to my house?”  In our society there are many things people can do other than come over to my house.  We’re not exactly the most personal society, we are extremely fast paced and love being efficient.  

I am reading a book by Max Lucado right now called “Outlive Your Life”.  It’s been a good book so far that I would actually highly recommend.  One of the chapters I read this week was on opening up your door and heart to others.  At one point he mentioned that “In a church auditorium you see the backs of heads. Around the table you see the expressions of faces”.  I think I liked this phrase because so many times we can just go to church on Sundays and not even really think about the others in church that are in our church family.  Are we really even mentally present or just waiting to get to the Sunday afternoon nap or football part?  Anyone can put on a happy face on Sunday and who really knows how they are doing?

I realized in a way I need to get over myself with the thoughts of “why would people even want to come over to my house”.  As much as my thoughts are self-doubt they are also excuses for me to stay holed up in my life and not share it with anyone, because it can be dangerously painful letting people too close.

Another part of the chapter that I like was that it stated “When you open your door to someone, you are sending this message: You matter to me and to God.” You may think you are saying, “Come over for a visit.” But what your guest hears is, “I’m worth the effort.”  I have many friends that have invited me over to share in random spaghetti or soup meals that have literally made me feel like I was worth the effort.

So I’m going to try to not listen to my Martha Stewart voice anymore telling me that things have to be absolutely perfect. Because really my life isn’t perfect, whose is?  And I know way too many people that are worth the effort to invite over to ignore opening up my home.  I had made soup the other night before a study that was going on at my apartment.  It was just soup, literally some spices and water that I added noodles to.  Some of the girls that showed up had come straight from work or soccer and were able to grab a bowl, it was a little thing and really didn’t take much time to make but it was nice to be able to do even a small thing like have some good healthy soup for them if they wanted.  It didn’t have to be the Stuffed Cheese Manicotti with Olive Garden Salad and Whine.  It is still fun to be able to spoil people and throw parties.  But I think I will try to be more intentional with having people over with the attitude of “they are worth inviting over” instead of the “why would they want to come over” one. 

Bread Making Night

I am learning how to make wheat bread tonight.  I've made bread before in a bread maker but we are making REAL bread.  It has been quite the process complete with grinding our own wheat.  I didn't even know this was possible without a windmill.  Apparently you can buy (or borrow!) a wheat grinder.  The one we used was a small box and sounded like a vacuum cleaner on the verge of blowing up.  The only problem with making bread is that it takes an hour to rise, and then another ten minutes to rise again, and then has to raise again once in the pan.....so here it is over two hours later and we haven't even put it in the oven yet!  Not sure how practical it is for if you are hungry...but I'm hoping it tastes delicious!  But that's all for now.....just bread making, nothing interesting. :)

Flash Dance Party

I have two new room mates!  They are fantastic girls, and drama free…so far. ;)  A few weeks ago we were all sitting in the living room having a nice quite evening with me reading, and them doing homework and watching TV.  Our apartment door suddenly burst open and in rushed six of our friends holding a bright yellow boombox (complete with cassette player) blasting the song “Everybody Dance Now” and started a dance party in our living room.

This only lasted for the duration of the song since we are all way too old for this behavior now and not in shape for dancing that intensely for longer than one rendition of “Everybody Dance Now”. 

I’m just glad it didn’t happen tonight as I am watching “An Affair to Remember”, an older movie I hadn’t seen yet, and am near tears.  Darn old movies, get me every time.

Random Crazy Thoughts

I know this blog has really been just for a few of us and to have some good laughs.  So excuse me for a second if I get too serious.  I love talking about the crazy things that happen to us in life or that we do.  Honestly I just have a bad memory so part of creating the blog was to help remember all the fun crazy times!

I’ve been somewhat holed up for the last two weeks rediscovering that I like reading (yes, I’ve also been extremely sick so that hasn’t been a lie!).  I’ve read some really good books recently, on theology and opinions, and am just now starting some poetry (I know, who would have thought?...I don’t quite understand poetry yet but I’m only two weeks into my love of reading). 

Anyways, I’ve been realizing something over the past six months that has been really hard for me to take in and understand.  I’ve always wanted to get married.  My dad gave me my second grade drawings of what I wanted to be when I grow up a few months ago that he had kept all this time. It was a story book of me standing at a stove cooking and caring for my family, with three boys and one girl at a kitchen table, and a hamster in the corner..?...  This isn’t quite how I envision married life now but it does show that I had the desire to be loved and cared for from a young age. 

I joke a lot on the blog about finding a guy.  In reality I think it is hard for me to let single men close to me.  The male figures in my life have really been my close married friends.  I cannot express how much they have impacted my life between us all moving across the country to NY to play local concerts and help at a church, sleeping under the stars in Walmart parking lots because vans broke down, relying on each other for strength in good times and hard times, and then being ok with coming back to good old Olympia, WA when it was time.  They have truly been an example of what strong men are.  Just today one of them helped fix a car headlight for me while I laid in bed all day with a fever and watched Jane Austin movies (thanks Josh!).  It was a little act, but meant more to me than anything has in a long time for some reason.      

I bring this up because lately I have been wondering if marriage is not supposed to be my role in life.  Maybe it is and just not right now.  When I picture marriage I picture it as hard.  I picture it as a partnership.  I picture being able to spend time with someone and building a strong family.  I picture being able to teach my daughters that they are beautiful for who they are and to do crazy things like making laundry soap with their mom.  I picture having boys that are smart little witty geniuses (they’ll get that from their father of course).  I picture being able to respect a man so much for his love of God that we could face anything together with God’s help and write a love story together around God.  I picture being involved in his ministry, not necessarily a pastor’s wife because lately I wonder if some pastors even unfortunately get too tied down with church politics.  I picture being able to love others and have an open home for anyone.  It was around this time that I realized I needed to stop picturing things.

Here I am, in Washington’s beautiful capitol city, with amazing friends who love God.  Not only do these friends love God, but they have hearts for reaching people. Over the past few months I have seen God pulling at my friend’s hearts to reach people. Not just reach people, but to combine with other churches, to unify churches to love others instead of segregate themselves from each other.  Just last night we had young adults from multiple churches and backgrounds meet for a worship and prayer night.  I realized that I was so focused on what I wanted my role in life to be as a wife, that maybe this isn’t the role I have been called to yet.  It’s not that I would make a bad wife and mother, it’s just that it may not be my role right now.  My passion is with mentoring young girls, or young female adults, and I have been given such amazing opportunities lately to really get to know some amazing girls and share each others struggles and encourage each other. 

I have realized that I can love and encourage others and open up my apartment to others without having to be married.  Maybe my role for right now is be an encouragement to these young girls, to listen to them, to share in their struggles.  Maybe even to have girl nights and teach them how to make laundry soap! I am not saying that I am writing off marriage, some poor guy has probably been out there waiting for me to grow up and figure out who I am.  What I am saying is that my role in life right at this very second is to be single and I want to do the best at is that I can.  I want to be able to encourage others in our group, and love those people in Olympia that need to be loved (which absolutely terrifies me but I know creates strength).

So…..in addition to all that….part of my new love for reading came from listening to a podcast (I realize I am getting nerdier as this blog goes on), and then researching the speaker who turned out to be an author.  He wrote this book recently called “A Million Miles in a Thousand Years”.  I have not read it yet but am going to add it to my now ever growing list.  There is actually a conference that they put on every year in Portland that I think would be fun for a bunch of us to go to.  I know none of us are rich and can’t really afford it, but maybe we can save up for the 2012 one if they do it and use tax returns or something?  We all do love a good road trip, even if Portland is only a two hour commute away.

I’m going to go ahead and put a link for his book in here and a video to maybe get a free copy of the book.  If I do end up getting one I’m sure I will let you all know because I’ll probably try to convince you all to read it!  Anyways…..this may be the longest blog I’ve written but that’s where I am at in life.  So for the few of us that read actually this…thanks for loving me.

http://www.amazon.com/Million-Miles-Thousand-Years-Learned/dp/1400202981/ref=ntt_at_ep_dpt_1

Skiing Lessons

This weekend I went on a young adult snow retreat in the mountains.  It was a blast.  I think it was a blast because this is one of the first retreats I’ve been on in a while where I’ve just gone to go and had no one there I was trying to impress.  I could just be myself. 

Unfortunately just being myself brought some interesting things to light in the car ride up that I thought was already common knowledge.  I was a home schooler growing up, and to top that off, I was in a home schooler band.  If that were not the essence of geeky….having an eye patch while being young and in a home school band is.  I wore it because I had bad vision, not because I wanted to.  The boys I rode up with discovered this tidbit of information and ran with it.  When we got to the retreat we did a quick around the circle introduction where we were supposed to say the most interesting part of the drive up….ironically all of their answers had something to do with my childhood, i.e. being a home schooler in a band with an eye patch, and choosing to play the saxophone because it was the closest I could come to in elementary school to saying the word “sex” without getting in trouble and then switching to the French horn because I was told French horn players were good kissers and figured I could use all the help I could get. (Luckily the boys didn’t tell everyone the instruments and the reasons I played them)

I think one of the best parts about being able to relax and be yourself, was I got to know more people, and actually cared about getting to know them.  I had a great time just talking to other girls and not worrying about where someone else in the room was and how I looked to them at the angle I was standing in (yes, it is an effort sometimes).  I also learned how to cross country ski.  I’ve never been skiing of any type before but I have acquired some skiing knowledge though the years.  I heard that if you go skiing and want to slow down you point your skis towards each other to form a pizza shape and that will slow you down.  Apparently with cross country skiing it actually is a bad idea, because it crosses your skis too much and you end up in a wind-milling heap no more than 40 feet into the trip. That was my first lesson.

I was also told that if you want to suddenly stop then you just jab your ski poles into the snow and use your arm muscles to stop you.  Our group ended up going up a back country road hill that was covered in snow.  When we got to the top we realized we couldn’t go any farther and had to turn around to go down.  Brian, the first person to go down, had a bad knee and ended up in a heap on the side of the hill; Josh, the second person down went to assist him and somehow also ended up on the ground.  Being next to go down I slowly started my decent.  I started to pick up a little speed and decided I would jam my ski poles into the snow and stop myself.  Unfortunately while going down hill if you jam your ski poles into the snow to stop it actually has the effect of giving you a quick boost and you go flying down the hill!!  So there I was, flying down the hill, past Brian and Josh, slightly screaming on the way down (I’m sure it wasn’t too loud?).  The end of the hill connected with another road and if you don’t stop there are trees and a sharp drop off.  To avoid hurling into trees and a drop off….I chose to hit a snow pile that flung me on my back and knocked my hat off.  Hearing the cheers from the top of the hill of people that were obviously impressed with my skiing skills was enough to get me back on my feet again.  Every person after me came speeding down the hill and crashed into the snow pile (other than Jason who ended up in the tree limbs and bending a ski pole).  So there you have it…if you ever attempt cross country skiing do not jam your poles into the ground to stop yourself on a hill, and do not pizza stop while on flat surfaces.  Basically once you start you just have to keep going until you tip over....which will happen.